Putting the Great back in Great Britain

When I actually make the effort to write, I can see from my WordPress stats, what country my three regular readers come from. From Finland to China to the Yoo Ess of Ae, I’ve got the whole of Planet 🌍 covered. 😁 it’s probably the same person. A travelling shower curtain ring salesman, who’s bored in his travelodge of an evening.

For that guy, sitting in the equivalent of a Chinese version of a premier inn, I’m going to bring him up to speed on British politics.

Since Churchill (and maybe before that) through Harold Wilson, maybe Thatcher etc. Great Britain has has some strong influential leaders. I’m not sure where it went wrong. Might have been the Tony Blair part of history, but, in recent times, we’ve seen off Gordon Brown, David Cameron,Theresa May, the incredible Boris Johnson and now, we have the genius Liz Truss. More of the latter two later, but, first of all, for non uk readers, here’s my dumb brains view of how it all works…….

In England there are a myriad of political parties, but, only 2 main ones, Labour and Tory. (Liberal Democrats will be spluttering at reading that, but, voting for them is generally a stop gap protest vote in preparation for everyone returning to vote……Labour or Tory.). Think of voting Liberal Democrat as filling your punctured tyre with that gunk stuff to keep it inflated for 30 miles, until you can get a proper tyre fitted.

I think the only other English based party worth a mention is the Monster Raving Loony Party. Started many a year ago by a chap called Screaming Lord Sutch, it was set up as a politically satirical party and has been lampooning politics in Britain ever since. I like their latest manifesto pledge…….

To unite the population, we will surround the UK with a large cardboard box so people can be both in and/or out of the EU. This will be known as Schrodinger’s Brexit. 😁

They’ve never even saved their deposit in all the seats they’ve attempted to win. But never mind, at least they are a party who know they are loony’s 🤣

Returning to the current motley crew allegedly running the place, they have to be the weirdest group I’ve seen in my lifetime. The Labour Party had Jeremy Corbyn as leader for 5 or so years. He was so glum and lacking charisma, he avoided standing in front of grey walls in case he disappeared from view. He was so grey, it was obvious he was never going to win a general election unless he promised every person in the uk a million pounds each!

In the meantime, the Tory party had David Cameron. A man so confident in his own ability, he risked his job on the ‘should we stay in the EU or should we put back the Great in Great Britain by leaving the EU’. Unfortunately, he underestimated the clowns who surrounded him and the media. We found ourselves out of the EU, with Cameron, who supported remaining in the EU, falling on his sword.

Enter, Theresa May. She lasted 3 years as Prime Minister, before her flawed EU withdrawal agreement dragged her down the same way leaving the EU had done for David Cameron.

While all these changes were happening, the world carried on regardless. Russia had invaded Crimea without Great Britain lifting a glove, China continued to stomp its way round the world and the global economies lurched on, oblivious to the gargantuan British politicians being trolled out, and, blissfully unaware as to what Britain was about to unleash on the world………

BORIS JOHNSON…….

I don’t know what date or day of the week I woke up and discovered the media hadn’t been kidding about Boris Johnson actually becoming the leader of all of the disUnited kingdoms . It had to be a mad dream. I’d seen so many of his gaffes over the years, there was no way intelligent, sensible people would vote him in to lead the country. Absolutely no way. Never ever ever in a million years……..

But that’s what they did……..

He fibbed about how he paid for decorating number 10 (his new tax payers paid for luxury home), he fibbed about parties held during Lockdown, he mislead the Queen, he told uk fishermen they’d get their fishing waters back, he said on his battle bus the NHS would get back £350 million, he said Brexit would unlock major trading deals with countries outside the EU. The list goes on and on. It was no surprise he was eventually ousted and replaced by……….

LIZ TRUSS

What is WRONG with this country? If I’m proved wrong, I’ll run down the High Street naked, but, Liz Truss. I’m gobsmacked. She just is, well, hard to describe without me being sued. So, I’ll leave you with some videos to watch. This is our new sooper dooper leader. The person voted in by Conservative members to put the Great back in Great Britain. Watch the videos….I’ll leave it there. Hopefully sanity will prevail at some point. In the meantime, just enjoy the ride, watch the madness and get the candles out……..

‘Putting the Great back in Great Britain’ was brought to you by David Linden aka @qosfc1919 on Twitter ©️Dodo Productions 2022

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